Spiritual Friendship - Part II

October 8, 2007 | Filed Under georges boujakly, spiritual formation, spiritual friendship |

spiritual-friendship.jpgFriends naturally enjoy intimate sharing. Friends make time to develop trusting relationships. Friends enjoy being in the company of each other. But then superimpose a Christian model of friendship over these qualities and you’ll get at least one more non-negotiable characteristic of Christian spiritual friendship:

Spiritual friends help each other pay close attention to God.

Is there a higher calling of relationships in the body of Christ? Not to me! Christians involved in spiritual friendship help each other delight in God and in his word. As a discipline of the Christian life, spiritual friendship is no different than other disciplines in its purpose: To connect friends to God or to be transformed into the image of Christ.

Name 3-4 friends that help you connect with God? Can you name 2? How about 1? Then thank God, you are in the lower 25% of those who minister to God’s people. 

I have read that 75% of ministers do not have any intimate friends. Can you imagine going through the hardships and delights of ministry to God’s people without someone to listen to us and help us see God in our ministry? O, to be listened to! What a gift awaits us.

Here are a few words that are bandied about in the spiritual friendship circles: Connecting (also a book by Larry Crabb), accompanying, listening, soul friends, accompanying, Holy Spirit, spiritual direction, paying attention to God, the Connecting Church (a book by Randy Frazee).

I love the notion of someone to help me connect to God in my life. We think of Mary sitting at Jesus’ feet and paying attention to Jesus. We think of her great privilege of doing the discipleship thing that would not be taken away from her.

On the other hand, the Teacher, I suspect, was benefiting also. He was being listened to without being challenged to justify his teaching, he was being listened to without being accused of lunacy by his own family, without being accused as a blasphemer, without having to escape being stoned to death, without being denied, betrayed, having to perform a miracle, and disbelieved! He was being enjoyed and delighted in through pure spiritual friendship. Connection at the purest and deepest levels was being shared between Jesus and Mary. This connection between friends ought to be cherished and encouraged in our ministry contexts. It ought to become the norm for relationships in the churches.

To listen and to be listened to with total acceptance is a rare thing. It’s time to make it “koine” (or common), rather than elite. O to be a spiritual friend knowing that we are listened to seriously!

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2 comments so far
  1. Jay Lewis November 20, 2007 1:07 pm

    Georges,
    How true are your words! Not until I moved away from family and friends did I realize what a treasure the friends I had daily communication were to me. I have prayed and continue to pray for the kind of friend willing to ask the hard questions, willing to listen and willing to always be available should I need them. I miss our monthly discussion group!

  2. Georges Boujakly December 18, 2007 6:08 pm

    Jay,
    Great to hear from you.
    Thanks for the comment.
    Where are you? What are you doing?